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New Home, New Route, New Hope

New Home, New Route, New Hope

Yesterday I wrote that a lot had changed and one of the biggest changes involves where I live. 

I now live in a different house,

         on a different street, 

                  in a different part of town. 

(Read in a whispered tone.) I am going to tell you something, but you can’t tell anyone.  Promise?  Because if you do, I will be more than a little embarrassed. 

Apparently it IS hard to teach an old (female) dog (but we won’t go there) new tricks! 

One Sunday, after having been in my house only a couple of weeks, I left church to drive home and before I knew it I was taking the exit off of the turnpike to my old house!  I’d driven, totally unaware of my mistake, several miles out of my way to the wrong house! 

See why I don’t always like change?  I’m not smart enough to manage it!

Thankfully, before I turned into the drive and attempted to park in the garage, I noticed my mistake.  After I giggled, a tear formed in my eye. I had some important things facing me and I had to pay attention!

The day I moved into my new home it was 107 degrees.  Not so painlessly my life had been boxed up and carted across town.  I found that even though my possessions were all present and accounted for, my heart was somewhere in between. 

I didn’t think of the old house as mine (unlike Katharine Hepburn did in the video clip below).  It had been ours, so I didn’t feel at home there anymore.  I lived there a few months before the divorce was final and each day, I felt I was waking up in someone else's house.  A couple’s home; not a home for a single woman.  I often caught myself reaching for my husband – but he wasn’t there.  I spoke to him more than once before I grew accustomed to the fact that he wasn’t there and he wasn’t coming back.  I guess I am a slow learner, or maybe just a reluctant one. 

If I didn’t accept the circumstances, then maybe they would change. 

And though I loved my new home, it seemed strange.  It was made of wood and bricks and glass – but had no memories.  My only memory so far made me laugh – it was when I fell off of the paint bucket landing, bottom first in the paint tray.  Now you understand why I was painting my dining room…it was my new dining room and needed just a touch of paint. To refresh your memory of my three point landing click here

But then I remembered how I found my home (details soon) and remembered how blessed I felt at the time…

I knew where my new house was, I just had to figure out how to make it a home and make it mine. 

As I share my journey I plan to focus on the lessons I have learned and the light that God has brought into my life rather than the ugly details of ending a marriage.  If you want trash talk and buckets of negative feelings you will have to watch one of the many talk shows that airs each day.  I choose to focus on new beginnings, new flower beds and new views and and new digs and new drapes and new challenges and new joys. 

God has assured me in many ways that He knows the plans He has for me,” [declares the LORD,] “plans to prosper me and not to harm me, plans to give me hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11 (Amplified)

I am taking Him at His word and I am finding that great things can happen, if I choose to open my heart and mind…

This is a strange/interesting video that I found online the other day…as you are probably figured out, Calla Lilies are very special to me.  I love their simplicity and their beauty.  I plan to plant bulbs soon so that I can enjoy their beauty in the spring, in my new garden. 

Email subscribers:  To view an embedded video of Katharine Hepburn, click on the title of this entry and go to my website.  I found the reference and her performance very interesting. 

Link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WNtz0r5pmXo

 

"The calla lilies are in bloom again.  Such a strange flower – suitable to any occasion.  I carried them on my wedding day, and now I place them here in memory of something that has died.”  Katherine Hepburn

These lines are from the play "within the play," Enchanted April, in the play Stage Door, which in turn became a 1937 RKO feature starring the late great Katharine Hepburn.

These are the flowers I carried on my wedding day, notice the Calla Lilies…now you know why the video clip caught my attention…

Living and healing with Grace…and i’m grace

 

3 comments (Add your own)

1. Annie Joy wrote:
I have been AWOL and am just getting caught up. I believe that your recent posts will help another friend of mine, with whom I've recently reconnected -- from that community where you and I have roots. She's a dear friend from high school who has also recently gone through a divorce, moved from her home to an apartment and been laid off from her university position. She is finding her way, as you are, with grace and strength. I know that she will appreciate what you have to offer. Blessings, Annie

Thu, September 1, 2011 @ 2:44 PM

2. Grace wrote:
Welcome back. I would love to think that my words could help someone. Thank you for sharing my blog with her.

Fri, September 2, 2011 @ 10:05 AM

3. CL wrote:
I sent your blog entry on divorce to an old high school buddy whose husband left her and it devastated her. Since she was the money-maker she had to pay him money and alimony. Here is her reaction to your latest blog:

"Oh boy...i'm sitting here w tears falling from my eyes...i can so relate to the beautiful writing of your friend. it touched me in so many ways. even after all this time and how far i've come it's amazing the depth of the pain and heartache that remains. i need to finish the last chapter in my marriage and that is the divorce. financially there was no incentive for me and the process painful - so i chose to focus on getting me strong, doing things that i liked, being with my family and friends and my career etc. but there is still unfinished business and for both his and my sake as well as or maybe more importantly for our son's sake, we need closure.

The other friend I sent this too, divorced from a bad marriage (then he died) also related to your piece. Keep writing! It takes guts to share your feelings and you do it well.

Fri, September 2, 2011 @ 11:00 AM

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